A warm welcome to Raise and Shine!


Firstly, hats off to you for simply having arrived on this webpage. In a busy world, with so many things competing for our attention, the drive, time and effort that got you here shows that you are someone who cares deeply about your children and the quality of your family life. This is not insignificant; many are indifferent, too proud, or stuck in their ways to bother - so you are already off to a great start!

And seeking support makes total sense. Whoever you ask, few who have done it would disagree that being a parent can be a very tricky business, no matter how much we love our children.

Let’s face it, as well as being deeply rewarding, being a parent is also stressful and highly frustrating at times. It throws up continuous challenges, it’s complex and messy, and, unfortunately, as the old adage goes: children don’t come with an instruction manual! At the same time, raising your children is arguably the most important thing you will do in your life. What other such important work would you embark upon without any help or training?

The fact that current research calls into question many of the conventional wisdoms of parenting makes getting support even more sensible.

So this is the place to be if you find you don’t always like who you are as a parent or, if maybe you feel your children don’t respect you, or, if your relationship with them is currently not what you would like it to be. Quite frankly, you may just be fed up with all the nagging, bribing, blaming and yelling that we all resort to in times of desperation. You may simply want fresh ideas for a more positive alternative to restore your own sanity and to raise happy, resilient children.

Raise and Shine aims to equip parents to feel better, to be more in control and to build stronger, more joyous relationships with their children. It aims to assist them with making their family lives a bit happier, calmer and more fulfilled, with the longer-term aim of setting up families (regardless of background and family set up) to create their brightest possible futures.

There is no single effort more radical in its potential for saving the world than a transformation of the way we raise our children.

Marianne Williamson

Laura Markham, Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting

“Parenting isn’t about what our child does, but about how we respond.”


All techniques taught are evidence-based:

The Toolkit


The Knowledge

The first Raise and Shine tool is knowledge because, as we all know, knowledge is power.

Understanding the core principles of optimal parenting (grounded in the latest research from the world’s top experts in the fields of psychology, neuro-science, child-development and mindfulness) provides a vital foundation.

And yet, parenting is rather like driving a car in the sense that no amount of reading, memorising information and intellectual comprehension will make much difference when you get ‘behind the wheel’ and actually try to drive. Or, to use another analogy, it’s the same difference between merely reading a recipe and actually cooking and tasting it!

The Skills

Cultivating the necessary skills to apply and implement knowledge effectively is where (returning to the car analogy!) the ‘rubber really hits the road’ and that’s where the second tool aims to help.

The second tool is the ‘box of tricks’: these are The Skills you need to cultivate strong, respectful, sustained relationships based on loving-connection, and to tackle the particular challenges you face in the reality of your own life.

Practicing these skills in the coaching setting and doing homework exercises ensures parents discover not just what they should be doing but how. This brings it to their real lives in a meaningful, realistic way. Practice makes progress!

The Compass

The final Raise and Shine tool is The Compass. I help you identify and connect with the things that really matter i.e. your values; clearly identifying the things that mean most to you about being a parent, and the values you wish to impart upon your children.

This is because challenges and setbacks are part of life, no more so than when it comes to parenting. Crystal clear values act as our parenting compass, so that when we stumble or get off track (as we all inevitably and repeatedly do!), we can pick ourselves up, find our bearings, and carry on in the direction we want to go.

Coaching Approach

Philosophy

Raise and Shine is all about ‘squeezing the juice out of life’ … this should not stop because we have children!

Raise and Shine understands that happy healthy parents = happy healthy children so helping parents identify and meet their own needs as well as their children’s is key.

Raise and Shine honours that we are all different: every child, every parent, and every family. Parenting is just as much an art as it is a science and there is plenty of room for creativity and individuality.

That is why at Raise and Shine I aim to avoid a ‘one-size fits’ all approach. Instead, I like to give parents room to find what works for them. I provide a range of different ideas, approaches, practical skills, tools and tricks that they can play around with to find what works. And yet, all the ideas have one thing in common: they help parents unlock the doors to a more positive, connected relationship with their children and build stronger parent-child connections.

By helping individuals create happier families, I hope to help build a future that is brighter for everyone. Individuals make families, families make communities, communities make countries and countries make a world.

Raise and Shine coaching draws from:

  • Positive Parenting
  • Playful Parenting
  • New Authority (also known as NVR)
  • Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)
  • Mindfulness
  • Compassion Focussed Training

Pieced together in your own way they make:

  • Creative Parenting

Book a Session

Coaching


Individual Consultations £90

I am available for either online or face-to-face (in SE15) sessions. I welcome individual parents/carers, or couples learning together. These sessions last 60 to 90 minutes. I follow up consultations with a summary report with action points and supporting materials where needed.

6-Week Coaching Package £490

The 6-week package can either be taken as a structured coaching programme covering the fundamental principles and core skills of positive parenting with mindfulness or as individual ‘ad hoc’ sessions.

School Talks / Workshops £500

I am available to deliver talks and workshops to schools in South-East London on a variety of topics of interest to parents such as:

  • Bringing Out the Best in Your Children
  • Handling Tantrums and Meltdowns
  • Getting Kids to Cooperate
  • Raising Resilient Children
  • Helping Kids Break Free From Anxiety
  • Overcoming Homework Horrors
  • Raising Kids in the Digital Age

I am available on Mondays, Tuesdays and Fridays.

Book a Session



 

courses

Example Content

Introduction to mindfulness
(based on ACT model)
  • connecting with what you really care about
  • managing your emotions - even when your buttons are being seriously pushed
  • Taking care of yourself
“You can’t pour from an empty cup”
 
Descriptive praise
  • encouraging confidence, cooperation and motivation
Emotion coaching
  • helping children manage their emotions and regulate their behaviour
  • building emotional intelligence and self-esteem
  • fostering strong relationships
Setting up for Success
  • preparing our children to do their best
Rules and Values
  • establishing values and using rewards
Positive Discipline
  • understanding and responding effectively when children get things wrong

About Daisy

Daisy at work

I am first and foremost, proudly a mum to 3 wonderful kids; a role I consider as one of the most valuable things I will ever do in my life.

My passion for parent education came as somewhat of a surprise because, prior to having children, I was a self-confessed sceptic about the very idea of ‘parent education’. I believed that love and natural instinct were all you needed. This was before we hit the ‘terrible twos’ and I discovered no amount of love and natural instinct convinced my son to get up off the supermarket floor and stop stripping the shelves in a violent rage or to put his coat on when it was time for school!

By chance, in a bid to meet new parents at my son’s nursery (and a chance to drink a cheeky glass of free champagne!), I attended a talk put on by the PTA by a positive parenting expert that gave me serious ‘food for thought’ and challenged my ideas and existing practices. Vitally, it offered real solutions: simple, practical ideas to establish better, more positive communication and encourage cooperation and to achieve a more positive and harmonious home life.

It offered real solutions: simple, practical ideas to help establish better communication and encourage cooperation and to achieve a more positive and harmonious home life.

I was sufficiently intrigued to try it out and the results were immediate: my relationship with my children improved and my home life got notably better. My husband was flabbergasted by the change! And so, my curiosity was sparked, and I went on to take a parenting course and then trained with The Parent Practice to become a Positive Parenting Educator.

There was, however, still one piece of the puzzle missing. While I found positive parenting skills highly effective, I struggled to be consistent. When 'real life' got in the way—like being late for a meeting or dealing with my son dumping his entire box of Lego right before bedtime—I often forgot to apply those positive parenting skills. In those moments, my reactions were hot-headed and harsh. I hate to admit it, but sometimes my behaviour was quite childish, even though I didn't have the excuse of actually being a child.

In these instances, it was clear that the problem was me, not my children. I soon realised that the key to positive parenting success was to better manage my own emotions and behaviour. This realisation led me on a fascinating journey of self-discovery. I trained in mindfulness, read books, attended talks with leading experts, and took courses in ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Training), New Authority (formerly known as Non-Violent Resistance), and meditation. I devised ways to adapt what I learned into practical ideas and practices that fit my life as a busy, modern parent.

As a result, I became much better at responding intentionally to my children rather than reacting impulsively. I discovered better ways to stay calm and kind, even when my kids were 'pushing my buttons'. I also learned what to do when, inevitably, things went wrong once in a while.

The result was I got far better at responding intentionally to my children, rather than reacting wildly.

In 2015 I founded Raise and Shine, which I set up with the aim of helping other parents better manage the challenges of parenthood.

There are too many idealistic ‘before and after’ stories banded around and, when it comes to parenting, we are all in our own place on the journey. Like everyone else, I am still in the middle of it; I still have my fair share of LPMs (Low Parenting Moments) and I continue learning: I still learn new things from my children and about myself every day.

And yet, I can honestly say that I have made a complete U-turn with regards to my opinion about parent education. I wouldn’t be without it. That is because I no longer feel I am ‘getting it wrong’ so much, and no longer am I at a loss as to what to do when facing parenting challenges. I am building really wonderful relationships with my children and being a parent genuinely feels far easier, less of a mystery and a lot more joyous than it was before.

Indeed, the first-hand experience I have from the work I have done myself with my own family and the positive results I have seen with the clients that I have worked with, shows me that by taking the time to learn and apply effective parenting tools it is possible to create a better functioning family with strong relationships and thriving children who are confident and content. And couldn’t the world do with a whole lot more of these?

It is possible to create a better functioning family with strong relationships and thriving children who are confident and content.

And so, I now believe parenting support should be the norm rather than the exception and this is why Raise and Shine exists: to empower parents to be their best. No one thinks twice about seeking advice and support from a midwife when they are pregnant, or a health-visitor when they have a small baby. I am here to give parents the support they need as they raise their children in the complex modern world.

I have learned that:

  • Being a parent is not easy
  • Being a ‘perfect’ parent is impossible
  • But being a parent is good

I have field-tested the theories, and developed the tools. I know that with the right knowledge, vision and skills you can get creative and find your own unique parenting groove too.

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